Mother's Blessing

I've gotten a lot of questions about my recent Mothers Blessing/Baby shower. I am more than happy to share the details on planning one, and creating a bohemian setting without breaking the bank. 

If you're wondering what a Mothers Blessing is I'd describe it as a celebration of life, love, pregnancy, childbirth, and motherhood. It is rooted in the traditional Navajo ceremony called a "Blessingway," that centers around appreciation, harmony, and shared wisdom towards the mother to be. The purpose is to nourish, nurture, support, and encourage the Mother to be. Both affirming her vision for a beautiful birth experience and the continued support from her tribe as she journeys into motherhood. 

I'll start by saying, I have had a lot of special days in my life, but I have to say, this one tops them all in how meaningful it was. I felt so unbelievably supported as the inspiring women in my life gathered together in ceremony to celebrate my rite of passage into Motherhood. A Mother's blessing is a wonderful addition to a traditional baby shower to take the time to not only celebrate the arrival of a newborn with cute little gifts,  but to also acknowledge and hold space for the Mom to be.

I had so much fun planning this special day! I had a very grand vision thanks to my pinterest search for "bohemian baby shower" As all the images came filtering through, my heart started to flutter with joy. I had to make my own "design on a dime" version of this come to life with all the inspiration points on my pinterest board, I'd say I did a damn good job of that (with the help of family and friends who contributed as well!!)  I'll get into the full budget details later in this post. For now I'll just talk about the logistics of the day's events. 

Initially, when invitations were sent out it included a piece of  teal colored card stock with these words attached about the ceremony  "Graciously bring a prayer, a letter, a poem, or quote to read to Emily written on the included note card to support her with love and strength during our brief ceremony circle. The notecards will then be added to a book for her to cherish"  

I planned the party for between 25-30 people to be incredibly relaxed and informal. As family and friends arrived the food was already laid out banquet style, there was no formal time in which everyone ate at the same time. Guests helped themselves to artisanal finger sandwiches and a hearty salad as well as apple cider sangria or an autumn spiced iced tea. 

There was a henna tattoo artist as well as a dream catcher craft station for everyone to contribute to a huge dreamcatcher for Ryders nursery. Everyone had time to craft, get tattooed, mingle, eat, drink, and be merry for a little over an hour before the ceremony started.

Once the ceremony started my Mother saged and cleansed the space as the shamanic leader of the ritual drummed and chanted.  I sat in the middle on a little throne cushion while everyone gathered. Once the energy and intention was set to the powers that be, each guest had an opportunity to share their own words of wisdom, poetry, or a quote as I silently sat and soaked in the meaning and beauty of their words. Not having the opportunity to talk during this ceremony was another piece to it being so special. I didn't have to worry about saying the perfect response. I could then just absorb and be fully present. 

The ceremony closed as we all stood in a circle and tied red thread around our wrists to symbolize the connection we all share. As we stood, bound together in the web of red thread, I could finally speak and share the emotions and gratitude that came up during the Mothers Blessing. To tie off the bracelet, each woman turns to the person next to her, and helps cut and tie the thread around the wrist. This red bracelet will stay on each woman's wrist until word goes out that birth is underway, then the thread can be cut to release the birthing blessings to the Mother. 

(Overall, the ceremony lasted a little over 30 minutes.)

 After the ceremony circle, my husband arrived to meet and greet our tribe, sidecar donuts were served and enjoyed as we then opened some pretty amazing and thoughtful gifts. 

As you scroll through the photos below, keep in mind, I do not have endless heaps of cash to support my dreamy pinterest boards. Everything included was at minimal cost, you just have to be willing to shop around, wait for sales, use coupons, and of course call on the help of the people around you to borrow decor and necessary items. I'm hoping this post might offer you some realistic insight to keep costs at a minimum. 

First of all, much gratitude to my dear friend who offered her home, I didn't have to worry about budgeting a space. The only rentals I used were from Burbank Party Rentals And that was for the 2 banquet tables that held the food and drink,  4 children's sized tables, and the table linens. All of that cost a little over 100. I went with children's tables to not only keep a grounded and low key bohemian vibe, but to also save money in not having to rent chairs. That shaved a lot of money off the budget right there!

In styling the setting, I obviously didn't want my guests sitting in the grass. Ideally I would have used woven rugs patch worked across the lawn, but that lofty idea was not in my price range, so I used several of these mexican blankets. (As a yoga teacher I already had several of them, and borrowed the rest from other yoga teacher friends, which added no extra cost.)  As far as the pillows go, It is a bit of a vice of mine, but they all belong to either me or my sister-in-law. Between the 2 of us we had 30+ pillows. Insane. The pillow addiction added no extra cost to the party.  

Each place setting consisted of incredibly cheap eco friendly paper plates, and recycled wooden forks purchased from amazon. The gold chevron cloth napkins were borrowed from a friend who saved them from her wedding. A little twine and a feather to tie it all together added a cute touch at a small price. 

Instead of center pieces that would just get tossed, we made "edible" center pieces of charcuterie boards. Each wooden slate was purchased from Michaels, on sale and with a coupon for $5 each. The charcuterie cheeses, meats, crackers and fig jam were purchased from Costco and the olives and nuts were purchased from Trader Joes. Everything was divided amongst 6 boards. Again, super cost effective and easy

The food was the biggest chunk of the budget, a chef (who is also a dear friend) made 4 different style finger sandwiches and a hearty fall inspired salad. The menu:

  • Smashed chickpea and avocado on multi grain bread with sprouts, tomatoes and basil.
  • Smoked salmon on pumpernickle with dill creme fraiche, capers, red onions and cucumber
  • Aged cheddar and chutney on brioche **my favorite** 
  • Prosciutto and fig jam with brie and crisp pears on baguette
  • Autumn salad with roasted butternut squash, bacon, pumpkin seeds, and a creamy garlic dressing over greens. 
  • Dessert: 3 donut flavors from sidecar; pumpkin, cinnamon crumb, and huckleberry  

I was able to borrow 30 small mason jars from a yoga studio I work at to drink the sangria and iced tea out of. I added a small pop of color to them with recycled cardboard teal chevron straws.

All the greenery was purchased from Trader joes for just 1.99 a bunch. I got 10 of them. Laying it flat around the tables took away the need for purchasing vases which looks naturally gorgeous. The most pricy flower purchased was 4 bunches of baby's breath for 4.99 each. In hindsight I could have purchased less greenery, to save a few dollars, but the look ended up being so lush and lovely. My mother ended up saving and wrapping a bouquet of the leftover greenery, eucalyptus, and feathers with twine and dried it out to hang in my bedroom. It still smells fresh and looks darling. 

The rest of the decor I used is either from things I purchased to decorate Ryder's nursery or items from my sister-in-laws little boy's nursery. So, don't be afraid to ask around to borrow cute little signs, or banners to hang and adorn the space. If you really are striving for that "bohemian" vibe, remember bohemians are unconventional artists, so the more eclectic the better, get creative! 

 The dream catcher craft station cost less than $25. I just love the way each person added different ribbons, and beads, pompoms, and feathers to adorn the piece. The teal colors pop and look so playful hung in his room. 

The henna tattoo artist was another sizable expense for the day, however having one was a huge part of my vision. A bonus is that the henna also  technically budgets as a take home favor for the guests. For those of you that live in the LA area I highly recommend Opal moon henna, she is so talented.  **If you choose to do belly henna and want to show it off on your special day,  I highly recommend setting up an appointment to get yours done 2 days before the party, so when people are hugging and loving on you during your event, you don't have to protect and be cautious of smudging the wet intricate design. Also, to really get a high quality mandala, you'll want to set aside at least an hour for it, and you don't want that time sucked up while you're trying to enjoy the lovely day you worked so hard to plan!**

In addition to the henna, I also made a little favors packaged in a teal paper bag with a small candle purchased on amazon for each guest to light once they hear Ryder has started his earthbound journey. Here is the note I attached to each candle. "Just as a tree grows best when anchored firmly in the earth, so can a pregnant mother feel strong and capable when supported by a sisterhood of nurturing friends. When you hear the word that Ryder has started his journey into this world, light this flame with calming thoughts and love in your heart." 

As I sit here and write this, killing time as I anxiously await the arrival of Ryder any day now, I look back and feel so overwhelmed with the love everyone brought to this special day. I feel so honored and so blessed to have had this sacred time to truly feel the depth of emotions it is to embrace the shift from Maiden to Mother. I hold this circle very sacred in my heart, and am so grateful that I have a community of women who gather together to uplift this Mother to be. Since this day, when I see one of the red thread bracelets on someones wrist I'm instantly uplifted by the bond and connection we made on this special day. 

 Please let me know if you have any questions about the details on planning a day like this for yourself. 

*Photos are thanks to my long time friend Andrea Jeffe