Things I learned about Italy while in Italy: 

They don't use toilet seats. Just a porcelain bowl - but every bathroom has a bidet. 

There are ruins in every nook and cranny of this country.

Cigarettes are still cool, but they still smell and taste awful. 

Wine is really good and really cheap. 

They cut pizza with scissors or fold an entire pizza in half and in half again to eat it. 

Italian food is only truly delicious when you are in Italy. 

Drivers don't give a fuck. 

Don't bring animal masks to the vatican during Mass unless you want your passport taken away. 

The locals are incredibly nice. 

Bambinos are treated like actual cherubs. 

The pope is the biggest celebrity in town. 

Traveling to Italy once is not nearly enough.